Keeping Things of No Use

Why do I keep things that have no use? Sometimes I look around my apartment and think I need to clear out some stuff I never use, but it’s not easy.

In the kitchen, I now only do minimal cooking. I often buy prepared foods and use the microwave more than the stovetop or oven. So why do I have so many pots and pans? And why do I keep my shelves of cookbooks?  When I want to make a new dish, or use certain ingredients I have at home, I look for recipes on my iPhone and print them out or sometimes just use them while looking at my phone.

In the bathroom, I have a collection of hand creams that I received as gifts and have never used. I’m not sure why I keep them, perhaps because I appreciated the person who gave me the gift, they are in attractive containers, have nice aromas, and maybe one day I will start using them.

I retired from work about six years ago, pre-COVID times. My closets held suits and heels for years that I wore in my research scientist role, that I hadn’t worn in a long time. I finally donated most of the suits and heels, although I still have some of the suit blouses. Once in a while I have need to wear one, and whenever I look at that part of my closet I see them hanging quietly, and feel they are waiting, hoping, to be used so they can get out of the apartment again and see the world.

And since I am on the topic of work and retirement, I have file cabinet drawers with papers and articles that I brought home from my office when I retired. I don’t need the hard copies, as I have most of them on my computer, and I haven’t looked at them for years. Maybe it’s time for them to go. The file drawers, and the storage area in my basement, contain lots of old receipts and bank and investment statements that were related to my tax returns. The standard period that the IRS requires that I keep these items is three years, but I have some from decades ago. I even bought a shredder to help in the task, but I am not ready yet.  

I consider myself a bibliophile. I have always loved books- the look, feel and smell of books. I even named my first dog “Bibliophilia.” I like to hold a book in my hands, rather than read books on a screen. And ever since childhood I have revered books, perhaps because my European -born parents always emphasized the importance of learning. I would never write in books, not even dog-ear pages I particularly liked. On my shelves I have some books I really enjoyed, and I keep them in case I want to read them again or refer to them. But I also have many books I know I will never read again. I have given away some books to friends, and donated others, but many that I am unlikely to open again still sit on my shelves. Perhaps they too are waiting, along with my old work blouses, to be held and used.

Why do I keep all these things? Having the space for them means I don’t feel pressed to discard them. But I think the real reason is that they are reminders of my past, of places I went, people I knew and achievements I had. And their familiarity is a source of comfort. Perhaps I will be ready to discard them as I create new directions in my life.